Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Mystic Knights of the Desert

I'm at a Holiday Inn in Demning, New Mexico. We've actually stayed here before, 4 years ago on our first tour. It's one of those swanky ones, with a bar in the lobby and a continental breakfast. Of course, the continental breakfast has no bearing on us at all as we're never up and ready to eat by 10 AM. Speaking of hotels/motels/Holiday Inns, I wanna talk about the nastiest place I've ever stayed in.
An hour or so after crossing into Texas, you'll reach Marshall, Texas. Nick thought that might be where that movie "We Are Marshall" took place. I thought it was in our neighboring West Virginia. I guess I could look into it, but I can't really be bothered by some wack Matt McCauneghey?? movie. Anyways, in our quest to save money, we decided to stay at Marshall's Budget Inn. Now there are motels called Budget Inn all across the US, but I don't think they have anything to do with each other. All of them have different logos and signs and look completely different.
We should have asked to see a room before we forked over the $53 to stay there.
Remember that kids, if there is an inkling of doubt in your head that the motel you're staying in might be the kind where roaches are playing poker when you walk in, ask politely to see a room.
I can't describe the smell. Just take my word it was a godawful mixture of sulphur, BO, rancid cheese and a faint lingering dirty diaper smell!
OK, it wasn't that bad, but it was bad. Let's leave it at that. Our new bass player Derek was tempted to sleep in the van after I told him he was sure to contract Scabies if he slept in one of the beds and Scabies lay eggs in your skin. He toughed it out as did the rest of the boys. Thankfully, my recent purchase of an air mattress at Super Target in Orlando really came in handy. No Scabies here. You'd have to ask the other boys if they were so lucky.
Short story short, a screaming baby kept us up most of the night and woke us up from a few hours of unrestful sleep at 7AM. Did I mention that I love babies?
So we stayed in a flea bag motel. It wasn't the first time, and it sure as hell won't be the last. It was just the worst. So remember Marshall, Texas and Budget Inn and stear clear amigos.
In better news, we had a day off on our drive out of Austin to Phoenix so we stopped at White Sands National Park in New Mexico. You've gotta go through a government checkpoint or 2 to get there, but Sickels was wearing a Jack Daniels hat, so the guards just asked if we were all US Citizens, we said "Yes, Sir" and he waved us on. I appreciate the security, especially considering the government Missile testing ranges around there and lord knows what else.
White Sands is wonderful. Sand that is pure white and looks like snow as far as the eye can see. We goofed around a bit and filmed some stuff on our sweet camcorder and everyone offered that White Sands would be a "pretty great place to take 'shrooms". So if you're at all prone to desert mysticism or 'shrooming or our nations lovely national parks, or just white sand, check out White Sands.
I'm off now, but hopefully I'll check in sooner next time. Internet connections aren't as easy to come by as everyone would think.
So if you have a heart at all you'll go to your local record store or Amazon and buy/order it. Help a brother out.

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